Fuck Sake!!

1. My tooth broke....well the thing they put over a little hole in my tooth broke! Not impressed mate!

2. My car is broke! I don't have 1st or 2nd gear. Driving is rather difficult. I've stalled twice today grrrr....

3. I quit work today, my manager was being a total cow to me again.

4. I still have no contents insurance

5. I still have no Dave

6. I'm very immature apparently :) yay. Well I am fucking 18 after all.

7. Still don't have a transfer of call from 02.....

ARRRRRRGHHHH!!!!

Home

That was it. Just there. I saw the words 'now Single' and it struck me down.



I can't sleep tonight
Everybody saying everything's alright
Still I can't close my eyes
I'm seeing a tunnel at the end of all these lights
Sunny days
Where have you gone?
I get the strangest feeling when you belong.
Why does it always rain on me?
Is it because I lied when I was seventeen?
Why does it always rain on me?
Even when the sun is shining
I can't avoid the lightning
I can't stand myself
I'm being held up by invisible men
Still life on a shelf when
I got my mind on something else
Sunny days


I hate what he's done. I hate the fact Travis is actually giving me a weird sense of comfort. I want him to feel how I feel.

All I do is work. Yesterday 7-3, today 11-7 tomorrow 7-3, tues 7-3, wed 7-11 5-9, thurs 7-3................

I'm applying for a transfer to Falkirk.
I don't want to go back to uni, I don't want to think about it or talk about it.
I wish none of this had happened.

I might dye my hair brown. I always need some stupidly drastic change when shit happens. Though if I go brown I'll look like Kate 'in it for the cash' Nash...

Happy Birthday Blogger!

8 years old today.

I'm about to go and work a 3-9 shift, had the dentist this morning and drove to and from hampden last night (stress). I feel exhausted and just want to be in Stirling. I just want things to be back the way they were. I want I want I want I want. I sound like a spoiled brat.

Chilis last night was alright. I was knackered though, and they didnt even play Under The Bridge, was all new material for all those new fans. However Jim Gellatly on XFM played Higher Ground on the radio which really cheered me up. Anthony Kiedis was looking pretty fit but didn't really care for the crowd much. I think he's tired of touring and singing.

Biffy Clyro were pretty good too.




I'm glad you've gone.

AAAAH

Just done a 7-1 shift and am now taking my little brother to see the Red Hot Chili Peppers. STRESS STRESS STRESS didn't sleep at all last night through troubled thoughts. I need some rest and relaxation.
'Mon CONNECT '07!

It's amazing...

...how your life can change and turn upside down in the space of an hour. I miss him, I love him. I understand.

Dave, my best friend, I promise.

Update

A few things

I now have a chatroom over there, say hello....

oh and another thing! If you say you're going to 'delete your myspace', do that....rather than just deleting me :) can you not just tell the truth for once?

Oh why do I even care, why oh why oh why do I even give a shite?! Because I hate liars, that's why.



ONE TWO THREE FOUR TAKE THE ELEVATOR AT THE HOTEL YORBA I'LL BE GLAD TO SEE YOU LATER.



10 days!!!!

Anything for the limelight

Person 1. I actually cannot take you seriously anymore!!!!!

Person 2. I wish to god you'd told me at a different time. Love you though.

Person 3. Sorry for not keeping in touch as much. You freaked me out a bit though.

Person 4. Get a grip, you are going to fuck it up again if you're not careful.


I hope at least 2 of you read this. I hope number 1 reads it most though!

Take note!

I don't care about the music anymore. It's all about the images. Still and silent.


Harassment is the most irritating form of flattery!

Excited Maggie!

Dave purchased the best birthday present for me last night. He wanted it to be a surprise but I know what I want more than he does :P....

so this is the bad boy itself...




I'm excited!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Roll on the day! I'm going to take sooo many pics with that baby.

Somedays....

1. Will you just leave me alone, I am NOT yours.

2. Get a life in the real world.

3. Please realise that I need you.

4. I don't want to be with you all the time anymore.


Each number is different person. Maths is fun.




[some words from Regina]

Downtown, Downtown
I'm not here, not anymore
I've gone away
Don't call me, don't write

I'm in love with your daughter
I wanna have her baby
I'm in love with your daughter
So can I please

Downtown, Downtown
I'm not here, not anymore
I've gone away
Don't call me, don't write
I've gone away
Don't call me, don't write
Don't call me, don't call me, don't call me
Don't write, don't write, don't write, don't write, don't write

Somedays aren't yours at all
They come and go
As if they're someone else's days
They come and leave you behind someone else's face
And it's harsher than yours
And it's colder than yours...

Sit up, and pay attention....

If there's something inside that you wanna say
Say it out loud it'll be okay

I will be your light.






[the beta band for a special friend]

A Post from my old blog I particularly liked....

I'm considering unblocking my old blog.....there are some nice lil things in it. I particularly liked this entry.
My brother's exam results were really good by the way!!






Tuesday, July 18, 2006
The Bride Stripped Bare
This book has opened my eyes to things which have happened years ago. Things which have happened a month ago and things which are happening now. It shows me what may happen in the future too. However, I loved this little extract, and I hope some men out there may take some wisdom from it.

--




"Lesson 43

the law for everyone is duty first, pleasure next



What you want:
The lights turned off. A touch that's gentle, slow, provocative, that builds you up, that makes you want it too much. An orgasm; it doesn't have to be at the same time as the man, just one orgasm so that you know what everyone's talking about. Eye contact. A quick coming that's not on your breasts or face. Holding afterwards, skin to skin. Oral sex, precisely where you ask, for as long and soft and as slow as you'd like. Sex that's uncomplicated, with no ties, where the man will do exactly what you want. Claiming happiness for yourself: you're so used to focusing on your partner's pleasure at the expense of your own.

What you do not want:
To suck a penis. The smell of stale smoke. A tongue in your ear. Underwear involving satin or g-stings or leopard print or lace. The vaginal sex to go on too long. A thrusting so hard that it burns, it hurts. Swallowing. Breast sucking, breast licking, breast anything. To be asked what are you thinking. For it to be pushed upon you when you're tired, grubby, not yet wet. Being pinned down. A rush to get in. A penis that's too big. Loud snorting at climax, or groaning, or any expression like "ooh yes, baby" and "c'mon". For the roll-over after the coming to be too abrubt. To be kicked out too quick.

What you love:
The arch of the foot, its bones, rake splayed. Wide, blunt, clean fingernails. Michelangelo wrists. Cleanliness. The nape of your neck nuzzled. Your eyelids kissed. Burrowing deep under the blankets. Clothes to be drawn off slowly, in exquisite anticipation. Cold, smooth walls you are rammed against. The sound of a lover's breath close to your ear. Your hair pulled back when he's inside. Your name spoken aloud just before he comes. Connecting, a holiness fluttering within you both. Seduction that's slow, intriguing, unique, by flattery, extravagant gestures, text: poem scraps on napkins, filthy e-mails that should never be sent, love letters scrawled on Underground passes, a line composed in lipstick on your back as you sleep, written backwards, to be read in the mirror; oh yes, all that."

Copyright (c) Anonymous 2003 (N.J Gemmell)

Posted by M. Graveyard at 10:47 AM

How much does everyone love PostSecret?!

SO MUCH :) this weeks one is especially good I felt...



Oh by the way that's not my card, just one I really really liked ha ha ha ha ha.

Went to see Puppetry of the Penis last night and it was exactly how you'd imagine it to be. Lucy Porter was good also, a bit shakey at first but by the end everyone was really into it. However, the best so far, ever ever ever....

The legend that is, FRANKIE BOYLE. How much can I laugh in the space of an hour? Oh my gawd I thought I was going to die laughing....

GO TO THE EDINBURGH FRINGE!!!

In Response

to what she said....

I know I could, and I know I would given the chance. However, we are in different zones and stages, where I have spun past him and he is left lagging at the back, struggling and gasping. I wish I could take him under my wing, and I know it would be beautiful, but I can't. I'm so sorry to disappoint. So sorry.

Blue Fits

You are right to think that was about you....because it was :)

I'm watching Ace Ventura, it's pretty good. It's weird seeing Monika from Friends having sex with Ace Ventura........gross really.

Allan Spragg's leaving night is when I'm at Connect. That really upset me, so I'll write him a card and get someone to give it to him.

This weekend im going to the fringe...FRANKIE BOYLE!!! <3 woohoo.

Poison Prince

All I want to do is talk to him. I have nothing to say though. I wouldn't mind even if I just heard his breathing on the other end of the phone, it would be enough. I miss him.


When you tell someone to walk out the door and they don't, they stay until you stop crying, they stay all night with you just to make sure everything is okay. That's when you know that you have something worthwhile.


Thank you. You know who you are, and what you mean to me.